#45 Space to create

Being back is weird.

There is sudden pressure to "get a job" and "work". A close friend of mine talked about what he does about mundaneness of life and how everyone has it.

This fills me with fear. We are so busy doing all these things that we forget that time doesn't work in our favour. Time and space work in their own way. We can't control time. We have made little watches and filled our lives with a way to measure time in order to be accountable to others. But we don't own time anymore than we own the space in the atoms of our body.

If we don't allow ourselves to understand that the creative process takes time, we won't be able to create the life we want. We need to be gentle on ourselves.

I was thinking about our need - basic human need - to create, to be flexible and fluid and respond to things in a creative way. I think this is where some of our drama comes from. When an event happens, we have to respond and we use our creativity to do so. We change our plans, our thinking for a moment. We feel satisfied by this. So, we tell everyone we know about how we saved the Office Potluck or how we Managed some Relationship. But this isn't real creativity, you know. This is using a latent skill that we all have, that's so deeply shoved down on our list of priorities that when we have an opportunity to use it, to be resourceful, we get giddy.

I've been reading through my old journals and I came upon this piece that I wrote to myself when I was 18.

"As much as I love achieving goals, I must remember this truth - we must set goals for the right reasons, for ourSELVES. Do not cheat yourself, respect yourself, encourage yourself, give yourself time, space, and love. You are on the journey of life, and though you will meet special people, you are the only one who fully understands yourself. Cherish that relationship."